Stuck

A long time ago, I wrote a post about me being the captain of a sinking ship. It was a rough time in my life but I got through it and my ship didn’t sink and I fell in love and got married and moved to the great plains and started grad school. But recently, my ship has taken some hits: losing loved ones, living far away from family and friends, grad school, financial worries, 70+ hour work weeks, and a terrifying feeling I have messed things up somehow. Tipped the balance. Incurred some sort of curse. Because while I am so lucky to have all I have and be able to do all I do, I am exhausted in every possible way. And I haven’t posted in weeks and that is another way I feel like I’m failing. Because y’all are amazing and thoughtful and have been so supportive and encouraging to me. And I think y’all deserve better. Y’all deserve daily doses of humor and whimsy. And I’m not up to it right now, my whimsy is flimsy. But the thought of walking away from this blog has me in tears. So, I’m not. At least I’m not right now. But I also don’t know how often I’ll be posting in the next year. So if you can bear with me, I’ll forever appreciate it. If you can’t, I totally get it and I wish you all a life filled with cotton candy and completely devoid of aliens.

Love, love, love,

GotC 

25 thoughts on “Stuck

  1. mayke says:

    hey girl OTC, just read your post for the first time, i like your style. i’m a family docter (and also a contrary type myself i guess). you are describing the road to a burnout more than a ‘bad streak’. would love you to take care of yourself, accept that letting go of some stuff/the must-do-list is the way to recover. make yourself an A priority. load up that battery and then you’ll be giving again, cause that seems to be your nature from what i’ve read so far. just dont give out what you dont have enough of for yourself. and 70 hrs workweeks… thats just ridiculousness i’m afraid. best wishes!

  2. We all go through times like these. Living life is the first priority, writing about it comes second. I’m pretty sure we’ll all still be here when you are ready.

  3. Amy says:

    Sending you love and hugs!! Take a few deep breaths. Funny how we forget to do that from time to time. Don’t worry about us readers. We aren’t going anywhere!

  4. GotC! So sorry to hear you’re feeling so overwhelmed. The great thing about the blog is that it’ll still be here when you have the time/need/strength/WHATEVER (speaking from experience!!!), as will we be. You know where to find me (I hope!) if you need anything/a vent session!

  5. post when you can, I am not going anywhere.
    You have not failed, you are just going through what so many people do – a time where you have to invest everything you have to move toward a vision you have for your life. My stepmother used to say “this, too, shall pass” and so far, she has been right. It shall and you will get through it. Your whimsy will come out strong and whole. πŸ™‚

  6. I hope your flimsy turns back to whimsy soon. I really enjoyed reading your posts. This is truly the only blog I follow that makes me laugh out loud – and I love it. So do the people who hear me laugh on my tram rides home. Best of luck to you!

  7. Sorry to hear you are having a rough patch. You’ve had a lot of changes in a short period of time. Be sure to take care of yourself – if it means we hear less from you, so be it. Grad school alone sends some people into the sinking ship feeling.

  8. Onlylife says:

    I’m sorry to hear you are going through, so much recently. I hope things clear up for you soon and that you get back to your old self. Best wishes.

  9. thelisteningdreamer says:

    Of course we can bear with you, we love you! Get your ship in the right course captain, we’ll be rooting for you all the way ❀

  10. Hang in there, sweetie! Your posts have brought only nothing but joy (cotton candy and alien-free joy) to me and countless others out there. I only hope that the balance tips in your favor very, very soonly! You got this, girl! You SO got this! xoxo

  11. Calliandra says:

    You hang in there dearest! Everything will be alright in the end, and if it is not yet alright, then it is not yet the end.
    I took that from a film called ‘The best exotic Marigold Hotel’ .. This phrase has got me through many an exhausted patch of life …and also the film itself is well worth a watch on a down day. Your blog is kick ass and if you don’t write for a bit then who cares, I’ll be more than happy to enjoy your whimsy whenever you are able to muster it, be it this year, or next or some time after that. As I’ve said before you often lighten my day here across the pond and it means a lot that you take the time to put your self out there and share your life with us. I guess what I’m saying (long windedly) is no worries, it’s all good, keep smiling. Much love xx
    Ps failure is not really real you know…tis just the waves of this journey we are all venturing upon.

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