Me: If you ever signed your shirt and then took it off and threw it to another woman in the crowd, I would be really upset.
Captain Thoughtful: I can’t imagine a situation where that would happen. What are you even talking about?
Me: Yeah, but just in case crowds of people are cheering for you someday and they all want you to sign stuff for them, don’t sign your shirt and give it to some other woman.
Captain Thoughtful: I promise that will never happen.
Me: See that it doesn’t.