The Interwebs Sent You To Me For A Reason.

Every one in a while, I’ll take a look at the search terms people are using to find this here blog o’mine. And usually, I’ll make a few jokes about the terms and never think of them again, BUT, no more. I have had a epiphany and that is that the interwebs have sent these people to me for a REASON. And it’s so much more than an algorithm, these people NEED me. I have built it and they are coming in bizarre droves of random search terms. Welcome friends. Now, let me help you.

“Boyfriend calls me mama”

My dear, sweet searcher. NO. No. No. No. A million times no. The only person who could get away with that was A.C. Slater when he was dating Jessie Spano. Other than that, no.

“DTR conversation starters”

I am no fan of the DTR, but if you feel like you absolutely must have this conversation, I recommend that way I had it with Captain Thoughtful, via text message with a plate full of Tex-Mex in front of me and my best friend next to me coaching me through it. I sent him a text that said “Are you my boyfriend?” and then he sent me a text saying “Yes.” AND THEN WE GOT MARRIED. True story.

“Will Taco Bell bring back the chili cheese burrito” 

That is the dream dear searcher. You can find some that still serve it (check the comments on this post, and also just read this one) but my great hope is that someday, ALL Taco Bells will serve the majestic chili cheese burrito once again.

Is there such a thing as a professional advice giver? Because, I think I’m pretty good at this y’all.

 

25 thoughts on “The Interwebs Sent You To Me For A Reason.

  1. I love doing this on my blog. I get some pretty funny ones. I usually end up dedicating at least one blog entry a month to search terms people use to find my blog and it’s always fun!

  2. Dana says:

    Can we just ask your advice in the comments? Like: “What should I do with my life?” Or: “Is there a way to be happy, even though I’m fat?”

    1. Sure! Just keep your expectations low for a serious response. 😉

      Also, OF COURSE you can be happy and be fat. Just surround yourself in positivity and healthy non-toxic relationships, including the one you have with yourself.

  3. strawberryquicksand says:

    Why do you not have a “like” button on your blog? 🙂 I would have definitely “liked” this one!

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