I Was Ill So I Read Some Gossip Online. Here Are My Reactions.

As you all know, I was very ill last week and when people are ill they sometimes do things they don’t usually do. For me, that’s read gossip magazines. Here are my immediate reactions to some of the headlines.

“Prince Harry Has A Crush On Jennifer Lawrence.” 

Yes. He does. Because he’s a human person with a people heart. If you don’t have a crush on her, you’re a robot. That’s science.

“New Director Chosen For Jurassic Park 4.”

I literally choked on my jello.

“Veronica Mars Movie- Kickstarter”

I had no voice, so I couldn’t scream but if I could have, I would have. What I did instead was donate and now they are making the movie and now, now, I will have Veronica and Logan CLOSURE.

“Justin Bieber Blasts Lindsay Lohan On Instagram”

I fell asleep halfway through reading this, it was like “Justin Bieber…ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz”

“Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth Call Off Wedding”

Liam backwards is mail. I need to check my mail.


Anyway, it was a slow week.


26 thoughts on “I Was Ill So I Read Some Gossip Online. Here Are My Reactions.

  1. You know, the extremely sad thing is that when I read the title in my email, I was thinking how extremely lucky you were to be able to pull up memories from age 3…and how radically cool you were to list your age in Roman numerals.

  2. I am amazed at all the fun I get when I have a chance to catch up on the celebrity gossip that is out there! Thanks for the newest updates and you had similar “takes” on them, as I did! You get me to smile when I read you!

  3. Sorry. Jennifer Lawrence who? Maybe I live in the middle of nowhere and my internet has been taken hostage by aliens.
    veronica Mars on the other hand was great. I had not heard there might be a movie to conclude it. That would be really really good…probably. so many of the shows I like get cancelled too early. Flash Forward, Raines…

  4. This is so. Effing. Awesome. Witty retorts to ludicrious comments on celeb gossip = epic win!

    The idea that LiLo and the Beibs are Twitter-hating on each other is…I dunno…akin to al-Qa’ida and Saddam Hussein hating on each other (in that both are predictable and pretty damn lame). And this is why celeb gossip is my brain candy. 🙂 Hope you’re feeling much better after the plague!

  5. Billy Bones: ” Now isn’t that a story worth a hearin’?
    Pig Bar Patron: It was the first dozen times we heard it.
    -Muppet Treasure Island. 😛

  6. ROFLOL – great summary of not being sick & seeing the infotainment. I saw an article about missing “Miley Cyrus old hairstyle”. My response, I miss having thicker hair, kids suck! 🙂 Hope your feeling better!!

  7. Guess so. I always read the three word lures for YahooNews when I log on…Pope Francis Slips…was one yesterday. And, that was the one I thought would have the most impact on my day. Justin Bieber and Lindsay Lohan were not liking each other…but I fell asleep before I could find out why.

  8. Liam backwards is mail? That makes me wonder if parents that name their kids Liam have some sort of secret message they are trying to convey. Get it? Mail? Message? Oh I really should have slept longer last night…

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