You guys. All of your favorite nursery rhymes are about drugs. Think about it. Except you don’t have to really think about it because I did all thinking for you. You’re welcome.
- Mary didn’t have a little lamb whose fleece was white as snow- that was just code for Mary had a little drug mule who was carting uncut cocaine.
- Humpty Dumpty was sitting on a wall, get it? Up high? He was high. And then he fell and his life was in pieces. It’s a cautionary tale. Don’t do drugs.
- The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout? There is a drug called water. This one is too easy.
I think this is what happens when you’re watching TV because you can’t sleep and what you’re watching is a documentary about drugs, and then you fall asleep and wake up with this written in the notebook you keep next to your bed. I think.