Weddings Are Hilarious.

There are a lot of people who look forward to your wedding. Some people look forward to the meal, some to the booze, some to the togetherness, and some people apparently look forward to interpreting the way you and your groom dance. Those people are called “Grammy”.

Now, I’ll tell Β you what Grammy said but you have to promise not to tell her I’m blogging about her again because then I’ll be in big trouble and I’ll never blog about her again and then we all lose. Don’t be the person who makes everyone else lose. Ok? Ok.

Grammy: I don’t know if I’ll be able to contain myself when you’re walking down the aisle.

Me: Don’t. If you feel like clapping and shouting “Hallelujah” then please do. There aren’t any rules at my wedding. Except for two rules which are no smoking and no flip-flops. So, please feel free to express yourself in any way you see fit that doesn’t involve smoking and flip-flops.

Grammy: What would people say?

Me: I don’t care. It’s my wedding and I want everyone to have a blast, and if that means clapping and hooting and hollering, then so be it.

Grammy: I’ve never seen anything like that before.

Me: I think there will probably be a lot about my wedding that you haven’t seen before.

Grammy: Are you talking about alcohol?

Me: Yes. And also dancing. There will be LOADS of dancing.

Grammy: Oh! I’m looking forward to that! I would really like to see how Captain Thoughtful’s body communicates with yours.

(Pause for hysterical laughing)

Me: You mean through the art of dance?

Grammy: Sure! It will be very telling.

Me: Yeah, we’re going to stop this conversation right there. Β 

So, that’s a thing my Grammy said. So many people say that weddings bring out the worst in people, but I have to say, this is some of Grammy’s best material.

47 thoughts on “Weddings Are Hilarious.

  1. Ahahahaha. Grammy is hilarious. I think it was best for both of you that you stopped the conversation RIGHT. THERE.
    Since everything is allowed at your wedding, maybe Grammy should take the mic after the first dance, and share her findings with everyone in attendance. That’d be cool… No? Ok.

  2. beck16 says:

    Your Grammy sounds awesome!!

    My husband refuses to dance with me…and not because he can’t. Does that mean anything?

    1. I think that means you should create a powerpoint presentation about why he should dance with you and then make him sit through the slideshow of it until he agreed to dance with you. πŸ™‚

  3. Hmmm. I wonder what kinds of dancing your Grammy would find most telling. Will you be doing the Dirty Boogie or the Tube Steak Boogie at the reception? ‘Cause if that’s the kind she’s watching for I’d feel really awkward. Funny, but awkward.

  4. I hope you realize that we are all checking our mailboxes for invites to the wedding. Right? Not so much to enjoy the nuptials…more to trail Grammy around and listen to her take on Captain Thoughtful’s dance moves. πŸ˜‰

  5. *sigh* I didn’t have either of my grandmothers at my wedding–consequences of being a old bride, I guess. And though I wouldn’t trade them for the world, they were never as cool as your Grammy. She rocks!

  6. I would like to see how my body communicates with yours through the art of flip-flop wearing to your wedding.

    Sh*t. I’ve made this about me again, haven’t I?

  7. squirrel circus says:

    That has all of the makings of a great pickup line….”Lets see how my body communicates with YOURS? Shall we?”

  8. alvaromateu says:

    Kinda sounds like something my grandma does, minus the clapping but more cheering and thanking God someone’s taking me.

  9. “As to dancing, my dear, I never dance, unless I am allowed to do it in my own peculiar way. There is no use trying to describe it: it has to be seen to be believed… Did you ever see the Rhinoceros, and the Hippopotamus, at the Zoological Gardens, trying to dance a minuet together? It is a touching sight.” -Lewis Carroll.

      1. caityrosey says:

        Depends on the kind of dancing they’re doing, I guess. I had a similar comment made to me at a wedding I attended. My BF and I had been dancing the hustle and having a raring good time. I wouldn’t mind Grammy commenting on that. But I don’t think I’d want her comments on my Rumba or Bolero.

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