Is It Just Me, Or Am I Awesome?

TwitterSo, maybe I follow some celebrities on Twitter. And maybe I think that makes us friends. And, speaking as a dear friend, or you know, potential soul mate, I think it’s my duty to call them out on any ridiculous behavior. Because that’s what friends do. I’m nothing if not a good friend, and if my friends tell you I’m not actually a good friend, they’re probably liars.

Lately, I’ve noticed some of my celebrity friends have been self-indulgently tweeting (I’m not sure if there is a kind of tweeting that isn’t self-indulgent but that’s beside the point). They tweet things like “Hey! Does anyone want to get dinner with me?” and I’m like “Uh. You’re famous. EVERYONE wants to get dinner with you. You’re just tweeting that so a million people will @ you and tell you how much they want to get dinner with you, but you don’t actually have any intention of having dinner with them. You’re kind of a tool-bag.” I mean, seriously? What could be the purpose of tweeting something like that when you’re famous, other than relishing in the thousands and thousands of tweets you get in reply, none of which, you actually respond to. As your friend, I have to call a code a-hole on this one. Because that’s what friends do. Also, it really hurt my feelings when IΒ replied and said I would LOVE to have dinner with you and you didn’t say anything back. That really stung. Luckily for you celebrity twitter friend, I’m very loyal and forgiving so I’ll give you another chance.

Or sometimes, they tweet things like “I need a hug.” and then thousands of people (mostly girls if the celebrity is male and even mildy attractive) reply saying they would be more than happy to hug the celebrity- but trust me girls, they have NO intention of actually hugging you. I found this out after I spotted a celebrity who had tweeted that very thing like 6 months earlier. When I walked up to him and threw myself into his arms, he acted really surprised and then angry and even went so far as to call the police. I mean, what did he expect??! You can’t tweet you want a hug and then not accept the hugs being offered to you. I’ll tell you one thing, that celebrity lost a friend in me that day and not just because the court ordered me to stay at least 500 feet away from him, he lost my friendship well before he took out that restraining order.

I’m just saying, tweeting things like that is basically like asking “Is it just me, or am I awesome?” and then expecting everyone to reply verifying that you are indeed awesome. I mean, you’re already famous, do you really need that much more affirmation? Then answer is no. No, you don’t need daily affirmation of how awesome you are. You’re already famous and rich and have lots of friends and pseudo-friends who will eat dinner with you and give you hugs when you need them. Β You know who does need daily affirmations? People with low self-esteem. How about you use your celebrity for a good cause and tweet “Hey! Who wants to grab dinner with @LowSelfEsteemer?” and then lots of people will say they do and Low SelfEsteemer won’t have to eat dinner alone and nobody will think you’re a tool-bag anymore. The only self-indulgent tweets I want to see are those that are indulging in other people’s self. Are we clear on that celebrity friends?

Celebrities are so lucky to have me as a friend/potential soul mate.

33 thoughts on “Is It Just Me, Or Am I Awesome?

  1. I hate it when people post stuff like that… Usually it is my friends with lower self-esteem so I feel bad, but still! Why not call people specifically instead of broadcasting it to the world that you are either so cool that everyone should want to say “Yes, I’ll do it!” or so lonely and depressed that everyone will pity you. Either way, it’s obnoxious and bad bait. Good post…
    Now I want to know who this celeb was who put out a restraining order against you… I need to know if I need to strike them from my list as well. πŸ˜‰

    1. That’s so true! I’ve seen people who are in desperate need of attention post things like that as well. It always makes me uncomfortable. Thanks! And by court order, I don’t think I’m allowed to even say the name of that celebrity. πŸ™‚

  2. I am sure when you are a celebrity you will not stoop to such levels of douche-baggery. You will be the first person I follow on Twitter….

  3. See this just proves the fact that I think these celebrities WANT stalkers.
    I think its their drug. Fame whores! All of them!

    I recently got my cease and desist letter from Kim Kardashian. Don’t worry Kim I can totally read between the lines. *wink wink*

    I am cranking it up a notch in my stalking skills

  4. It’s official. I am the only person on Earth who’s not Twittering (tweetering?Twit-twatting?). I might just have to join the fun if I ever plan on snagging a Hanson brother as a roommate.

  5. I’ve pretty much convinced myself that I’m besties with all of the celebrities I follow on Twitter. Sometimes when they tweet out that they’re in New York City, I give them advice on what to do. They don’t respond to me directly, per se, but when I see a picture of them a few days later, they look just a little bit happier. I’m sure I’m responsible for that.

  6. Serenely Rapt says:

    Celebrities indeed ARE lucky you watch out for them and give them ‘constructive’ feedback. Whether they want it or not is immaterial. πŸ™‚

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