I know a guy who responds to everything you are saying with a question. Actually, what he really does is repeat the most important part of whatever you were saying as if it were a question. For example:
Me: Anne Bolyen was Henry VIII’s second wife.
Him: Second wife?
Even though I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that what I said was true, he made me think twice. At first, I just thought that was his way but now, now I realize there is a larger game at play. I realized this when I noticed a few things about his questioning ways. First of all, he only responded to the females in our group with questions. Second, the ladies (who are all intelligent and sassy) were fawning all over this guy by the end of the evening. That sly dog. I, however, did not fall prey to his little trap. Mostly because I found it to be highly annoying. I mean, I know I’m right yo! I don’t need your impertinent questions.
In fact, this guy was so popular with the ladies (and trust me, he is not what one would call a “dreamboat”) that I’m afraid his method of responding with condescending questions is going to catch on with sly guys everywhere. BE WARNED! A guy who responds to everything you say with slightly patronizing questions can only have one (or more) of the following motives.
1. He wants to throw you off your game. Question guy wants you to doubt yourself. He wants you to doubt everything you say. If you’re an expert in anthropology he will make you think you might have confused homo sapien with homo neanderthalensis, and that would just be crazy, right?! Why does he want to throw you off your game and doubt yourself??? So he has the upper hand. Do NOT give him the upper hand. You should be even handed. Your hands should be equal. Also, I think this guy might be a sexist. And a racist. I don’t really have any proof for the racism, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was true.
2. He just wants to keep you talking. You are so intelligent and fabulous, he doesn’t want you to stop talking to him. Questions keep you talking. It’s as simple as that. BUT- if his questions are laced with condescension then STOP TALKING TO HIM. His plan just backfired. Idiot.
3. This guy wants to make you insecure so you might hook-up with him. You might think this is the same thing as number 1. It’s not. If a guy is trying to make you doubt yourself (as in number 1) he has a larger plan for a co-dependent relationship. That guy is goal oriented. If he is trying to make you insecure, he just wants to hook-up. This guy is gross and shady. When you come across this guy, keep my motto in mind “Don’t be shady, be a lady.” And don’t let some scumbag make you insecure. Remember in example number 2 when you were intelligent and fabulous? That’s true. Don’t let a fool who asks too many questions make you forget that.
4. He truly has nothing of value to say. In this case, I can understand the questions. Poor guy with nothing of value to say. Pity him. But don’t hook-up with him.
Honestly, looking back on the other night, I can’t believe this guy got away with these crazy question shenanigans. C’mon ladies. Don’t fall for this. He didn’t even use a sweet pick-up line. There was no effort whatsoever. You deserve a little effort. Or, at the very least, you deserve a guy who doesn’t make you question your own intelligence with his questions. I’m just sayin.
Be on the lookout for this guy. As soon as you recognize him for what he is, walk away. Or run away. Or jump out of the moving vehicle. Really, there is no exit too dramatic. It’s the only way these guys will learn their lesson. But also be careful that he wasn’t asking a genuine question because then you will be the jerk. And that’s the opposite of what I want.