Who Knew A Question Mark Could Be Such A Jerk?

Who knew a question mark could be such a jerk?

I know a guy who responds to everything you are saying with a question. Actually, what he really does is repeat the most important part of whatever you were saying as if it were a question. For example:

Me: Anne Bolyen was Henry VIII’s second wife.

Him: Second wife?

Even though I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that what I said was true, he made me think twice. At first, I just thought that was his way but now, now I realize there is a larger game at play. I realized this when I noticed a few things about his questioning ways. First of all, he only responded to the females in our group with questions. Second, the ladies (who are all intelligent and sassy) were fawning all over this guy by the end of the evening. That sly dog. I, however, did not fall prey to his little trap. Mostly because I found it to be highly annoying. I mean, I know I’m right yo! I don’t need your impertinent questions.

In fact, this guy was so popular with the ladies (and trust me, he is not what one would call a “dreamboat”) that I’m afraid his method of responding with condescending questions is going to catch on with sly guys everywhere. BE WARNED! A guy who responds to everything you say with slightly patronizing questions can only have one (or more) of the following motives.

1. He wants to throw you off your game. Question guy wants you to doubt yourself. He wants you to doubt everything you say. If you’re an expert in anthropology he will make you think you might have confused homo sapien with homo neanderthalensis, and that would just be crazy, right?! Why does he want to throw you off your game and doubt yourself??? So he has the upper hand. Do NOT give him the upper hand. You should be even handed. Your hands should be equal. Also, I think this guy might be a sexist. And a racist. I don’t really have any proof for the racism, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was true.

2. He just wants to keep you talking. You are so intelligent and fabulous, he doesn’t want you to stop talking to him. Questions keep you talking. It’s as simple as that. BUT- if his questions are laced with condescension then STOP TALKING TO HIM. His plan just backfired. Idiot.

3.  This guy wants to make you insecure so you might hook-up with him. You might think this is the same thing as number 1. It’s not. If a guy  is trying to make you doubt yourself (as in number 1) he has a larger plan for a co-dependent relationship. That guy is goal oriented. If he is trying to make you insecure, he just wants to hook-up. This guy is gross and shady. When you come across this guy, keep my motto in mind “Don’t be shady, be a lady.” And don’t let some scumbag make you insecure. Remember in example number 2 when you were intelligent and fabulous? That’s true. Don’t let a fool who asks too many questions make you forget that.

4. He truly has nothing of value to say. In this case, I can understand the questions. Poor guy with nothing of value to say. Pity him. But don’t hook-up with him.

Honestly, looking back on the other night, I can’t believe this guy got away with these crazy question shenanigans. C’mon ladies. Don’t fall for this. He didn’t even use a sweet pick-up line. There was no effort whatsoever. You deserve a little effort. Or, at the very least, you deserve a guy who doesn’t make you question your own intelligence with his questions. I’m just sayin.

Be on the lookout for this guy. As soon as you recognize him for what he is, walk away. Or run away. Or jump out of the moving vehicle. Really, there is no exit too dramatic. It’s the only way these guys will learn their lesson. But also be careful that he wasn’t asking a genuine question because then you will be the jerk. And that’s the opposite of what I want.


18 thoughts on “Who Knew A Question Mark Could Be Such A Jerk?

  1. wiedsco says:

    I think, he’s just not paying attention. All he cath is the last words you said, so he ask back so you thought he was listening. Jerk.

  2. I think dnici is right. The guy pretends to be listening, but in between questions he’s probably scanning the room. Whatever his game, I hope it didn’t take the other ladies too long to figure him out.

    Great post.

  3. wontgoqu1etly says:

    Hilarious! I subscribe to your blog and just realised I’ve never actually told you, you’re a great blogger! I really enjoy reading your stuff. Please keep blogging!

  4. i think taking the higher road of so does your face is one of the most profound things i have ever heard! i intend to apply it to life. i think the worst one is smirky man. so you say something, and he smirks. it makes you feel like you are saying something super stupid when you know you are absolutely not. do one!

  5. dnici says:

    It sounds to me like this guy was only half way paying attention to the conversation and he was using a technique someone told him to use to make it sound like he was listening. I have heard so many “experts” say that you should take the main point of what someone said and parrot it back the them. It’s supposed to make people think you are engaged in the conversation even when you really aren’t.

    However, I think he is confused with the technique. Maybe parrot it back in the form of a question to keep the discussion going, but doing so in a condescending tone is not how it’s supposed to work. Heaven forbid he just actually pay attention and have something to actually contribute to the discussion.

  6. Slimy guys. Blargh.

    I met a similar version of ‘Question Guy’ once – but instead of just rephrasing my statement as a question in a condescending fashion, he would just say ‘Sounds made up.’ All the time, drove me crazy. Even when what you have just said is the obvious and unequivocal truth – such as ‘My name is Nancy’ – he will respond with ‘Sounds made up’.

    I would notice girls trying to justify everything to him. I took the higher road.. and just said ‘So does your face.’

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