Pick-Up Lines That Would Definitely Work On Me

Bar Scene

Listen, I don’t know why I think about these things. Although, conversely, I don’t know why I shouldn’t think about these things. The moral of the story is that there is a lot I don’t know.  Think about it. Or don’t. I’m not the boss of you. Unless I am…..am I? Whoa.

My old roommate and I used to text each other pick-up lines for laughs. Also,  in case we met a super foxy guy walking down the street- that way we knew exactly what to say. So, I’m pretty much an expert on pick-up lines. I mean, I’m not an expert on using them, but I am really good at reciting them at parties and funerals for laughs (because if there is one place you need to laugh…….) And although they are generally cheesy and ridiculous I have to admit there are a few that would definitely work on me.

1. Your body is a wonderland and I want to be Alice. Listen, if he makes an Alice and Wonderland reference, I am ALL IN.

2. Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, just a sparkle. Oh you.

3. Hello, I’m a thief and I am here to steal your heart. Stealing is against the law, but you have to admire a guy who would risk going to jail for you. That’s called love ladies and gentlemen.

4. You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me. Rhyming=way to my heart.

5. I know we’re not in Professor Flitwick’s class, but you are still charming. A Harry Potter pick-up line?! Marry me now.

6. Hey… Didn’t I see your name in the dictionary under “Shazaam!”? Why yes, yes you did.

7. If stars would fall everytime I would think of you, the sky would soon be empty. That’s poetry y’all.

8. If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you. Come on. I mean, wow. Quality stuff. How can you not say yes to that?

Please don’t judge me. In an effort to not lose your complete respect, I will post a list of pick-up lines that would NOT work on me tomorrow. But before that, feel free to share the pick-up lines that work on you. It’s oddly liberating.

26 thoughts on “Pick-Up Lines That Would Definitely Work On Me

  1. casey nace says:

    I’ve used this one and it has worked pretty good for me. ” may i borrow a kiss? I promise ill give it right back!” (Aww, haha ok😘, so sweet)

  2. Mattusavage says:

    Hows this one it worked for me once

    I wish I were a tear so i could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.

  3. And not one in Star-Wars-Style?

    “I may look like an Ewok, but I’m all Wookie where it counts, baby.” – one just wants to be under that force…

  4. I like! I like!

    I unfortunately have nothing else intelligent or amusing to say.

    No. 7 & 8 would so be awesome to hear, spoken with an Irish accent from someone that looked like Colin Farrell! Siiiiiigh!!!

    Excuse me while I take a nap just to wander off into dreamland! 😉

  5. Are you kidding…what girl would not be swooning with these?
    If someone told me #2 I would be blinded with love as he stole my purse and picked my pockets clean.
    Its no sin to love!

  6. I admit, I haven’t been in the single swing for a long time… but I am pretty sure the things that worked were:
    – can i buy you a drink? (why yes, alcohol is always good)
    – you seem cool. wanna hang? (indeed, i am cool, I get it.)
    – Wow.You are loud, crazy and really blunt! (okay, this was more an insult kind of thing, but i took that as praise for my winning personality and ended up marrying that guy. Just sayin’)….

  7. Lines that would work on me:

    1) You have a great smile.
    2) What’s your name?
    3) Hello
    4) I love the book you’re reading
    5) Want to watch me suck three tennis balls through four feet of garden hose?

    ok. i’m easy. i am a guy after all….

  8. Sadly, while I’d like to think I have more respect for myself than this, if a guy were to use a pick-up line on me, I would totally be like, “Oh my god, you actually dared to use one on ME?” My self-esteem is waaaay up there. While I have a boyfriend, and guys have been interested in me in the past, no one has seriously used a line on me. I must exude some sort of no-pickup-line aura or something. Therefore, I must get my boyfriend to use them on me for giggles.

    1. I just asked him for a random one, and he gave me more of an icebreaker (wait for it…) line.

      Him: Do you know how much a polar bear weighs?
      Me: No
      Him: Neither do I, but it broke the ice!
      Me: *groan*

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