In an ongoing effort to overcome my admittedly absurd fear of dinosaurs I bought a dinosaur (specifically a stegosaurus) cookie cutter and made dinosaur cookies. Basically, this was my attempt to make dinosaurs ridiculous thereby stripping them of their fear-inducing power over me. Like a cookie based Riddikulus spell. This plan was a two-parter.
Part 1: Make yummy dinosaur cookies.
Part 2: Watch Jurassic Park and see if dinosaurs still scare me.
The cookies were delicious and decorating a dinosaur with brightly colored sprinkles and pink icing definitely made it seem less scary but I think choosing an herbivore as my cookie cutter was a mistake. Because really, how much fear did stegosaurus’ really induce pre-sprinkle? Not much. I really should have chosen a T-Rex or Raptor because when I tried to watch Jurassic Park after baking, I found that those two still scare the rhymes-with-spit out of me. I didn’t make it through the movie. Not only did I not make it through the movie, I didn’t even make it through the first hour. The cookies tasted good though and were mighty helpful when I was eating my feelings of shame about not being able to watch a movie that most adults would consider only slightly scarier than Aladdin. (Jafar was really evil y’all, if I had known the term when I was 8, I would say he was a megalomaniac, but I stand by my description of him as a poopy-face.)
Although this little experiment was an overwhelmingly delicious failure, it did inspire me to coin the term SWA, which stands for “Spielberg Wins Again”. And it’s particularly relevant as I ‘ve recently read he’s eager to begin work on the fourth installation of Jurassic Park. SWA.